What what?

Alright. Here's the low-down.

I basically haven't been doing Weight Watchers for the last 6-8 weeks. Somewhere in there, I just kind of stopped.

Part of the problem is that my mom stopped doing it and didn't want to go to the meetings anymore. So then it got to the point where I was just going to weigh-in. And then I realized it was expensive to pay $12 a week just to weigh-in on a scale that someone else owned. So I quit going.

And then I slowly quit eating good. And started eating normal. At first I kept telling myself that I was going to get back in to the program after having just a bad few days or a bad couple of weeks. But then it never happened.

The thing is... even though I ate all that bad stuff in the meantime, I didn't gain any weight. I was still at 203lbs. And it KILLED me to be RIGHT THERE, right where I was almost below 200 again. So I decided that I am going to start up again. Starting yesterday today!

So I woke up this morning and decided to weigh myself, figuring I had gained. That way I could calculate how many points I was supposed to get per day. I hopped on the scale, doo doo doo, and... 198???

That can't be right. So I stepped off and stepped back on again... 198? REALLY? BUT HOW?

I have no idea how. And I am pretty sure it's going to be a fluke and that tomorrow I will be back up to 203. But even then I should have gained. I really thought I was going to go up. Apparently the weight loss from before has boosted my metabolism or something... Because the old me would have gained weight by now.

So... Here's the dealio.

February 8 (started WW): 227lbs
June 29 (today, restarting): 198lbs
Total loss so far: 29lbs

WHAT.

Wow.

Just imagine where I would be now if I hadn't quit for 8 weeks!

The end.

24

So I haven't updated for awhile, because I haven't been losing. A couple of weekends ago, I went to visit my brother at college. And I basically made the decision to just not worry about my diet, because it's impossible when you eat out for every meal for 2.5 days. Needless to say, that week, I did not lose any weight (but I didn't gain either!) And then the next weekend was Easter, and I threw that all out the window, like... three days before Easter. But that week I only gained .2 pounds.

So this week I decided to get back in the game, and I only really did bad on Saturday. Like real bad. But only one day, which is better than 3 days. Anyway, so I did really good Sunday and yesterday, and it paid off during the weigh-in. I wanted to lose 2.2 pounds, because that would mean I had lost 10% of my starting weight (which would be 22.8 pounds) and I actually lost 3.4 pounds, which I was NOT expecting, so I've lost 24 pounds exactly!

I am very excited and I really want to lose at least 3.8 pounds this upcoming week, because then I will be meeting the first personal goal I set for myself. The 10% goal was a Weight Watchers thing. So anyway... I am going to try and work my tail off... literally, and try to lose that 3.8 pounds. I know I probably won't, because that would be my biggest weight loss in a week since the very first week. So I won't be disappointed, that just means it will take me two weeks. But I am SO CLOSE to that first goal and I really want. So I am going to work my buttocks off. :)

Also -- my dear friendcousins, Hannah and Daniel, joined Weight Watchers 8 days ago and have already lost 9 pounds between them! So now it's like a big support network and it's awesome. I am very excited for all of us. And it's so much easier to do it with a team. TEAMWORK!

Then, to top it all off, today I went and got my haircut. I've been wanting to go short for awhile and it's exactly what I wanted, so I am very happy. I feel like I am starting to LOOK like how I see myself. Does that make sense? I am starting to reflect my inner-self on the outside.

Anyway. Gotta go watch my TV show so I can get to bed. Here's a -24/new haircut pic! :)

loser x20

This past week was an interesting week. First of all, I did really bad as far as the diet plan goes. I didn't keep track of my points at all Thursday through Saturday. And I haven't tracked (written down) my points since last Tuesday, even though I did it in my head the last few days. But I kicked major booty on the treadmill.

Throughout the previous weeks of Weight Watchers I haven't been exercising very much. I was lucky if I got one day in per week, and I think maybe two of those weeks I exercised twice. But this past week, I did FOUR days. I exercised on Wednesday and Thursday and then again Sunday and Monday. (My meetings are on Tuesday nights.) And I have finally noticed that it's starting to get easier. It's not that it's more enjoyable... but that I get more satisfaction out of it. Like I see the improvements I am going through, and that makes me feel better about exercising as a whole. And when I push myself and make it through, I feel so proud of myself. Like... "Hey, I CAN do this."

My whole life, I've been kind of chunky. Except maybe throughout high school 'cause I lost some weight. And I've always had that mindsight that I just CAN'T lose weight. I always thought, oh, I'll never be able to do it. Not really.

And now... I KNOW I CAN. And it's so thrilling. It makes every part of my life different. It makes me feel stronger, both physically AND emotionally. I CAN do things if I put my mind to it. I CAN make things happen in my life. And that is just... absolutely the best feeling in the world. It's not just about losing weight, anymore, it's about MY LIFE. I am a stronger person than I was on February 7th, the day before we started Weight Watchers. And it's amazing.

Today was our meeting, but Mom decided not to go. She feels as though she had a bad week and that she gained weight, so she didn't want to go to the meeting. So I decided that since she wasn't going to go, neither was I. So I made dinner plans with my bestie, but before I went, I decided to weigh myself on our home scale.

We just bought a new scale like a month ago. It's a digital scale. And it's a piece of junk. Every time I get on it, I think, "that's just not right." So I get off, wait for it to restart, and then get back on... and it tells me a totally different number... like TEN SECONDS after it told me another number.

Tonight I hopped on, so I could weigh myself since we weren't going to the meeting, and it told me I was one number. It seemed low, so I checked again. And it gave me the EXACT same number. So I thought, noooo... so I got back on again and it gave me a SECOND number. So I got back off and tried a FOURTH time, and it said the second number again. There was a 1.4 pound difference. And I'm like... dude, the only thing I could have done was inhaled an extra 1.4 pounds of air, because it was literally seconds after the last time. So I went downstairs and got our old scale out of the yard sale pile, and stepped on it. But the numbers are so small that I couldn't tell if I was the first number or the second number.

By this point I was getting ticked off. So I said "Forget it! I'm going to the meeting just to weigh-in." So I called up my bestie, told her I'd be 15 minutes late for dinner, and went to the meeting. And low and behold... I was BETWEEN the two numbers my home scale had given me. Haha.

So this week, I lost 2.8 pounds! And it certainly wasn't because of my eating habits, because I did bad. But I kicked that treadmill's butt and it WORKED.

I have now lost 20.8 pounds!!!!!!

I feel like I could climb Mount Everest! In 63 days, I've lost 20.8 pounds! That means I am losing about 1/3 of a pound EVERY DAY. I know pride is a sin, but I am so full of it right now, it's kind of sickening. I just... never thought I could do it. And I'm proving myself wrong. It's pretty awesome.

Since 20 is such a nice, round number, I decided to take some updated pictures to post. I was trying to find the same shirt as before, but it must be in the laundry. Instead I put on a similar shaped shirt, so it would seem more accurate... or something. HERE are the old pictures (I had lost 7 pounds then), and here are the new pictures:

(click to see it bigger)

I hope it doesn't sound like I'm bragging, though I guess in a way, I am. I just feel so accomplished. It's almost time to go buy some new clothes, because my pants are super baggy. I can't wait to treat myself to a shopping trip! :)

It's been awhile...

So it's been a few weeks since I updated last and there's a reason for that. Sorta. That reason + life + laziness.

This whole Weight Watchers thing has become a bit more difficult. For one thing, I hate exercising. So it's like... never enjoyable for me, and I never want to do it. Most of the time I end up exercising because I HAVE to... to get some extra points, because I over-ate at lunchtime.

Secondly, I've been having some trouble resisting the foods I really like. So I've been eating the things I like, but that aren't necessarily healthy -- but you can't have as much of them if you want to stay under your points... And then I end up still hungry. Or at least wanting more. So there have been a few days where I've just completely gone over on my points, because I just wanted to eat. I am still making MOSTLY good choices and tracking my points, but like 2 days a week I've been having some issues. AKA... THE WEEKENDS. Haha. It doesn't help that beer has points in it. LOL.

Then, last week, we went to our meeting and I only lost 1.4 pounds. Granted, that's still good! They say you should lose 1-2 pounds a week, because it's more likely to stay off... than if you lose like 5 pounds a week. Makes sense. But I've been losing 2-3 pounds per week, and then boom, only 1.4. So it was kind of discouraging. But the problem was, I had had a bad week, food-wise, so it made perfect sense that I would have not lost as much.

That's the thing, though... it all makes sense. It's got "Duh" written all over it. But it's becoming more of a struggle. And I was scared for that, because I don't want to give up. I don't want to stop doing this, simply because I am slowing down. So I was trying to stay positive over it, but it's hard, especially when just living MY life/lifestyle means I'm around bad things, like beer and bar food and out at restaurants a lot. It's hard to resist when things are made to order and can be given to you in 20 minutes or less. It's a lot easier to plan things and cook things "healthily" at home.

And then this past week, I had an even worse week than the week before. So I was thinking I wouldn't lose weight again, you know? Wrong. At tonight's meeting, I lost 2.2 pounds... so I have officially lost 18 pounds TOTAL. And that feels AWESOME, you know? Like victory! And it encourages me to DO BETTER instead of just have another bad week, you know? Mom and I are going out to dinner tomorrow night and I probably will go over on my points some, but it'll balance out, because this weekend I probably won't be drinking much. Not like I usually do, anyway.

So I am still trying. Still riding this weight loss train. And I plan to stay on it. It's just... some things are hard, but the actual weight loss itself is so encouraging. And it makes me want to stick with it. For example, this weekend, I got in to a pair of pants that I haven't been able to wear for probably like a year. And my butt was rockin' in them. ;) And, the weight I am at now... I haven't been this "low" since probably like... summer 2009. So that makes me feel really good about everything.

AND Mom has lost 18 pounds too! So we're right on track with each other and having her helps a lot. Plus, it helps me to stay on track, knowing it's working for her.

So this week I vow to do better! Drink more water, take my vitamins, exercise 3 days this week, and track my points (AND STAY UNDER!) Those are my goals. We'll see how it goes! :)

Recipes & Such

So my dear friend Nikki has a blog and she posts recipes she has tried and I thought I would give it a try, as well. The problem I've had is that I don't have the patience to cook. I've never really enjoyed it. But recently, since I've started this diet, I've been trying to be good and cook at home, instead of eating out for nearly every meal. And I have discovered a bunch of new things I like. I've had fish several times, and I even like steak, as long as it's not over-done. I didn't used to really like grilled chicken, because it was boring, but now I've discovered new ways to cook old things. So it's getting more fun, because I've been having success!

Yesterday the family and I went to Wal-Mart and I found this magazine.

I started flipping through it in the magazine aisle at Wal-Mart and immediately found several things I thought looked good, so I decided to buy it. There was a Weight Watchers cookbook I looked at last week at the WW meeting and nothing in it appealed to Mom and I, so I was thrilled to find this magazine with things in it that we would actually try. The first recipe I decided to try was a potato skins recipe. I also had found a fish recipe in the Weight Watchers bi-monthly magazine, so I fixed that as well. So here are the recipes!

(picture from here, though it's not the same recipe. it looks the same so i snagged it.)

Crunchy Oven-Fried Fish PREP 20 MIN BAKE 20 MIN SERVES 4

Preheat oven to 425°F. Place large rack in large rimmed baking pan; spray rack with nonstick spray. Place ¼ c all-purpose flour on sheet of wax paper. Beat 3 large egg whites in shallow bowl until frothy; whisk in ⅓ c fat-free mayonnaise, 2 Tbsp all-purpose flour, ¾ tsp paprika, and ½ tsp garlic powder. Crush 4 high-fiber crispbreads into fine crumbs; transfer to pie plate. Add 1½ tsp olive oil, ¼ tsp salt, and ¼ tsp black pepper; toss well until crumbs are evenly moistened. Sprinkle 8 (3-oz) tilapia fillets with ¼ tsp salt and ¼ tsp black pepper. Working with 1 fillet at a time, coat both sides with flour, tapping off excess; then dip in mayonnaise mixture and then in crumbs, pressing to adhere. Transfer prepared fillet to rack. Bake fillets until firm and coating is browned, about 20 minutes. Serve with 4 lemon wedges. PER SERVING (2 fish fillets with 1 lemon wedge): 280 Cal, 5 g Total Fat, 1 g Sat Fat, 0 g Trans Fat, 92 mg Chol, 676 mg Sod, 21 g TOTAL Carb, 2 g TOTAL Sugar, 3 g Fib, 37 g Prot, 37 mg Calc. PointsPlus value: 7.

I copied this from my e-mail, so ignore the weird font/colors. The only thing we didn't have for this recipe was flour, of all things, so I used cornstarch. I don't know if that's okay or not, but it turned out DELICIOUS. And Dad and I think it would work well with any kind of white fish. Plus, I think I might even try the breading recipe on some chicken. Yum.

To go along with my fish, I cooked Mini Cheddar Potato Skins.


Points Plus Value: 2 (per serving = 3 potato halves)

Ingredients:

• 1 pound red fingerling potatos (I just cooked the amount we wanted to eat, which was 3 whole potatoes)
• 1 tablespoon butter, melted (I used Country Crock instead of real butter)
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper (I omitted this, because I am not a fan.)
• 3 tablespoons reduced-fat shredded extra sharp cheddar cheese (I used 4 tablespoons because I had fat free cheese)
• 2 tablespoons thinly sliced green onion (I omitted this, because I didn't have it or need it.)
• Cooking spray

Directions:

1. Preheat broiler.
2. Scrub potatoes; place in a single layer in a microwave-safe bowl (do not pierce potatoes with a fork.) Cover bowl with plastic wrap (do not allow plastic wrap to touch food); vent. Microwave on HIGH 5 to 6 minutes (I did six) or until tender. Let stand 5 minutes or until cool enough to touch.
3. Cut potatoes in half; drizzle evenly with butter, and sprinkle evenly with salt and pepper. Lay cut sides up on a foil-lined baking sheet coated with cooking spray. Top evenly with cheese. Broil 2 minutes or until cheese melts, and sprinkle evenly with green onions. (We actually sprinkled bacon bits on ours.)
   

I am not going to type up the nutritional values unless someone really wants me to. And I am not sure that my potatoes were as small as they should have been, because 3 filled me up really good and I cannot figure at all how 3 of them were only 2 points. But the thing is, even if you are NOT on a diet, you can still make this recipe, just substituting whatever kind of cheese you want (and how much you want) plus onions or bacon bits... or adding sour cream, etc. But I will say that even though these babies had fat-free cheese on them (and not much at that) I liked them better than I like most restaurant style potato skins. The only thing I would want is more cheese. Other than that, they were amazing... as was the fish.

So all in all it was a delicious meal that I will be cooking again. :) Yum!

I am 5% Loser!

Today was another Weight Watchers meeting -- well, actually Mom and I didn't stay for the meeting, because she had a funeral to go to, but we went for the Weigh-In. And I lost FOUR MORE POUNDS!!!!!!!!

This means I have lost a total of 12.2 pounds! :D And when you lose 5% of your weight, you get a bunch of goodies. I got a little, cheap, plastic trophy -- which makes me ridiculously happy considering it's such a small thing. Haha. And I got a blue ribbon because I lost 10+ pounds. Plus, the little pamphlet is all about losing 5% of your weight. I haven't read it yet, because I was so excited I wanted to come home and write a blog entry about it all. So that's next on my agenda, to read that.

Mom also lost weight; she lost 3.2 more pounds. So she is down 12.6, I believe, and I am down 12.2. WE ROCK! I think this is all really a testament to just how awful we ate before, because these pounds are just falling off. Mom has been doing really good at exercising, but me... not so much. I know that eventually I am going to have to kick it up a notch, but I really hate walking on the treadmill. But Mom and I discovered a fun new way to exercise. I've only done it once so far; Mom and I bought "Just Dance" for the Wii, and it is awesome. (I like it better than Dance Central for Kinect, even though the Kinect takes funny pictures of you.) Yesterday I tried it out for the first time and was laughing through my work-out! My favorite song to dance to was "Cotton-Eyed Joe," haha, because you got to do goofy foot-tapping, "cowgirl" dances. And it was definitely a work-out. Some of the other songs weren't as much, but they were still fun. One song I didn't try yet was "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls. :D I can't wait to try that one.

We also tried a cardio dance video from Netflix, which wasn't as fun, but it was definitely entertaining to see Mom and I try to white-girl dance our way through that. We were glad no one could see us! Hahah.

Anyway, I am so very excited about all of this. My only wish is that someone had told me a long time ago that this program would work so well for us, because I would've done it months ago had I known. Oh well. The time is now and we are KICKING BUTT!

Eight Point Two

Just a little update this time.

Mom and I went to our meeting tonight and we were both losers! ;) I lost 3.6 pounds, and I think she lost almost 5 pounds. That brings her total to 9 points and mine is 8.2 (to be exact!) So I wasn't quite as far down as my grandparent's scale said, which I knew I wouldn't be, but I was still down, so that's what counts! It's pretty crazy considering that's what we've done in just one month (having one of those weeks off, too!) I know the weight loss will slow down after a bit, but I can't help but feel pleased with the results.

Unfortunately, something I had forgotten... if you miss a meeting, you still have to pay for it. Like... membership dues or something. It's $12 a week! If you miss, you still have to pay the $12. RIDIC! Oh well. It's working! I always said I would pay someone if they could make me skinny... so I guess this is kind of like that, haha. Plus, it's motivation to go to the meetings!

Picture Proof

I forgot I wanted to do this, so since I have the time and inclination, let's get it out of the way. :)

When I joined Weight Watchers, the leader of the meetings gave us her website address. So I went to it and one of the things she had on it was her story, and it was accompanied by photographs of her weight loss progress. I decided that I wanted to do that, too, so I could see how far I've gotten and use that as motivation to never go back.

So here's what I looked like at my starting weight:

And here's what I look like after a 9 pound weight loss (and a haircut!):


I know, there's not really a big difference yet. (I hate the belly! Ugh. I look pregnant!!!) I mostly took these -9 pound pictures tonight as my "starting" pictures, because I wasn't sure if I had any full-body shots of me or not. So here they are!

This is the start of a BRAND NEW ME!

A bigger loser?

Tonight I went to my grandparents' house and they have a digital scale. My dad has lost 60 pounds in the last 14 months, so every time we go there, he weighs himself. I decided to hop on tonight, even though I thought maybe I should just wait until Tuesday and the WW meeting. You know, to give myself 2 more days to work on the weight loss... But I got on anyway.

And I was shocked to find that I've lost five more pounds. Granted, I hadn't eaten anything but some grapes and a banana in 8 hours, so maybe it had a little to do with that, because I was completely empty. And maybe my grandparent's scale is different than my home scale or the scale at the Weight Watchers meetings, so I won't know for sure -- or at least feel like it's for sure, until Tuesday, but if their scale is right... I have lost 9 pounds! Since February 9th.

I don't want to base my weight so much on the number I see in front of me on the scale, but moreso on the number of pounds I have lost. So my idea is to use the scale at the Weight Watchers meetings as my regular scale. Because it has to be consistent every time, right? Unlike trying to base my weight on my scale at home, the scale at my grandparents', the scale at the doctor, etc. I am going to base my weight loss on the scale at the meeting. So maybe on Tuesday I won't be down five pounds, and that's okay, but I sure as sheep can't be five pounds off, right? Which means I still lost some! So here's to waiting until Tuesday to see for sure.

I will keep you updated, as I am sure you are all shaking with anticipation. :)

Time's a rollin' by.

It's been awhile since I've posted in here and my last post was about my "first" bad day. Well... let's just say I fell off the wagon and had lots of bad days.

The first week I was on WW, I lost 4.6 pounds. The second week, I am fairly certain that I didn't lose any, just from weighing myself throughout the week (which I regret doing in the first place, as it's discouraging.) I went to the meeting to find out for sure if I had lost any more weight or stayed the same and found out that the meeting was canceled due to a "water problem" in the building. After that... it fell apart.

Mom and I are doing Weight Watchers together, but I was going to that meeting alone, because my mom was on vacation. This was last week. Since my parents were out of town, it made doing Weight Watchers a LOT harder. Mom and I have done a lot of it together, from grocery shopping, to planning meals, to being each other's support. And once she was gone, I tried... for a couple of days... to "be good," but it just didn't work out. All I wanted to do was run through the drive-thru of some fast food place, instead of going home and trying to russel up some good grub. So basically, since I did badly, and Mom was gone... I just kind of gave up for the week. The whole time I knew I was going to start it again when Mom got home, but I just didn't care for the week. Which I realize is bad, because that meant that the weight I had already lost I was basically welcoming back with open arms.

Anyway, I haven't weighed myself for probably a week and a half or so, and I'm sure I've gained a lot back (if not more than I started at) but I am jump-starting the program again.

On Tuesday I started the program again, after taking basically a full week off. Our WW meetings are on Tuesdays, but Mom and I decided not to go this week because we had both had a bad week. Plus, Mom wasn't feeling well and had JUST gotten back from vacation, so we decided to skip. So I haven't been to a meeting for 16 days and won't go again until Tuesday. But I have done really well this week and will continue to do so from now on.

I am looking forward to getting back on track. Now if I could just find the energy/time to exercise.

Bad Day #1

So today was my first "bad" day of Weight Watchers. Every day since I have started I have managed to stay under my daily limit on points. (Except for Monday, I went five over. So I exercised five points off. *You get extra points for exercising.*) But today I didn't. I went WAY over.

Let my explain some... Before I started my diet, I was a fast food queen. I ate out for lunch every day at work, and sometimes I would eat out for dinner, too. Plus, since I am such a social butterfly ;P, I ate out for almost every meal on the weekends. One of my habits included eating Chinese for lunch once a week with 2 or 3 of my co-workers. I love Chinese food. But my favorite thing to get is chicken lo mein. Even though I am on Weight Watchers, I am not prepared to 100% give up all of the things I love, including chicken lo mein. But I do plan on practicing moderation and portion control. I want to be healthier, and skinnier, but I don't want to do it at the expense of my complete happiness and if I can't ever have McDonald's or Chinese again, I won't be a happy camper. So I plan on indulging myself, just not as often and by cutting my portions down quite a lot.

Anyway, so we go to this one Chinese take-out place called King Garden, and this is what I used to get: Lunch special of chicken lo mein (no mushrooms) with a "side" of fried rice and an order of crab ragoon. So today I decided I wanted to indulge in some Chinese, but I was going to be good. Well then I looked up the point values for what I get. Here's what it said:

1) One cup of chicken lo mein = 9 points
2) One cup of fried rice = 10 points
3) 1 crab ragoon = 5 points

That totals 24 points. Keep in mind that I only get 37 for the day.

So I decided not to get crab ragoons, even though that sucks, because King Garden has delicious crab ragoon. So that meant that if I only ate one cup of rice and one cup of lo mein, I would be eating 19 points -- which is more than half of my daily allowance. I had only eaten a banana for breakfast, because it is 0 points and I wanted to save up for my Chinese.

Now, my plan was to eat about half of what I got. Because usually I ate ALL of it, including five crab ragoons. So I figured half of it would be alright... even though it was "bad" food, points wise, I was still significantly cutting down what I WOULD have ate two weeks ago. So I got out a measuring cup and measured out one cup of rice and one cup of lo mein. And let me tell you, 1) It was a small portion, 2) It barely made a dent in what was in the box, and 3) I plowed through those first two cups like it was nothing, because I was so hungry.

So I had 2 more cups of lo mein and 1 more cup of rice. That means that for LUNCH I ate 47 points. FORTY-SEVEN points! That's 10 more than what I get DAILY. And that's what I ate for lunch. NOW... let's think of it THIS way...

Two weeks ago I would have ate that whole box. Since I ate about half of it, let's double 47. That means I would have ate 94 points of rice & noodles. Then I would have ate 5 crab ragoons... so let's add 25... That means that I would have ate 119 points for lunch. If this was two weeks ago. Now, think about that in terms of my day... I would have ate 5 for breakfast, so 124... And then my dinner... I would say I probably averaged about 30 points for dinner each night, unless I went out to eat again, which God knows how much it would have been then. So on a typical weekday two weeks ago, I would have ate a total of 154 points... in one day.

Now I eat 37 or less... It sounds super crazy, but the reality is... I am not hungry. I am not starving myself. I am simply eating better food in smaller portions. Instead of an 11 point double cheeseburger from McDonald's, I'm eating a 9 point piece of baked chicken breast. (Most of the time. Not including my indulgences.)

It's just... it's no wonder I lost 4.6 pounds in a week. I went from eating 154 points in one day, to eating 37 (or less) in one day. (Points are calculated up from grams of fat, protein, fiber, and carbs, by the way. But not calories.) For one thing, I think that's awesome. For another, it puts things into perspective for me. Because I was wondering how many points I would have ate before on a typical day. Granted, I didn't eat Chinese every day, so I would have not had 150 points per day... but I probably was averaging around 100, and more on the days I ate at sit-down restaurants.

It's just crazy!

But anyway... so today I went over my points with just lunch. And I think that would've made me crazy a few days ago, I would have felt so guilty. But what I feel is this... I ate LESS than half of what I would have two weeks ago. PLUS, afterwards I felt sick to my stomach, because I ate so much oil. I don't want to feel like that, so I won't do it very often. AND I told my co-worker that I was NOT going to throw away the leftovers, that I just could not do that. So I put it in the fridge at work. 4 hours later when I left work, I said to myself, "Girl, you do NOT need this." And I trashed it. And walked away. I am so proud of myself for that.

And I am proud of myself because even though I was 10 points over on the day, I didn't give up... I went downstairs and walked on the treadmill and earned 5 of those points back. So right now I am only 5 points over. And now... I am going to go make myself an egg sandwich, made from egg whites, on a whole-wheat English muffin, with a slice of reduced fat cheese. YEAH!

Weight Watchers - Week 1

On Tuesday, February 9th, my mom and I joined Weight Watchers together.

This is something I had been thinking about doing for awhile, because one of my co-workers had been having a lot of success with the program, and I had been considering trying it. The motivation I needed, I guess, was my mom's help.

See, I've wanted to lose weight for several years, but I just kept gaining. And I guess I hadn't come around to wanting to help myself yet... I wanted to be skinny, but I wasn't worried about being healthy, you know? And I knew I needed to change my mindset. But I guess the real kick in the butt came from my mom. Her doctor has been needling her to lose weight for years now... And finally we decided to do this together. I want my mom to be healthy, because I want her to be around for a lot more time. And if this is what she needs to do, this is what we're going to do. Yes, I am doing it a lot for me, but I think the motivation to stick with it will be because I want to do this for my mom. Help her through it. So essentially, we are helping each other through it.

We joined last Tuesday and went to our first meeting. On Wednesday, we started the diet, by eating better and keeping track of our points. I know some of the people who read this won't know the system of Weight Watchers, so I'll go through a brief rundown.

Every day a person in WW gets so many points. My personal daily total right now is 37. This number is based on several factors including my height, weight, and age (I think.) As I lose weight, my daily total will go down, but for now it is 37. Every day I am supposed to eat those 37 points. There have been days when I was under my points, but not by many. The program is designed for you to eat all of your daily points so your metabolism stays up.

Anyway, along with the daily 37 points, each WW member gets 49 extra points for the week. I know this isn't the healthiest way to do it, but I am saving my points for alcohol. I usually drink one night a week (on the weekend) but sometimes two. So my points will be saved for that... and if I have leftover weekly points and need them, I might use them, or might not. It just depends if I need to, I guess.

So that's how the system works...

The thing is, since I was like 12, I've wanted to be skinnier. In high school I lost about 30-35 pounds, but then in college I gained all of that back, plus 40-50 more pounds. I would love to go back to the weight that I was when I graduated high school. So that means my overall goal is to lose a total of 77 pounds. Obviously I am going to take my time with that, I know it's not going to happen overnight, or even in a few months or anything. But the thing with this program is that... I can do it.

Every other time I have tried to diet, I have lasted no longer than one month. And it's because I didn't know HOW to diet. I didn't know what was really good or bad, how much a real portion size should be, how to set limitations for myself. Basically, I couldn't keep it under control... so I always gave up. With this program, it's different. Already I can tell, even though it's only been one week. The thing is... having points... and having books to look at and point calculators, etc, it gives me... it's real. Something I can hold on to. A DAILY goal to look at. It makes it seem attainable.

Let's say I want to cook chicken for dinner. I get out my little book and look up chicken. And it tells me that 4oz of chicken is 3 points. So we bought a kitchen scale. And I weigh the pieces of chicken to find out what 4oz is. Then I put some seasonings on it and bake it. And I know that for the rest of the day I have 33 points.

It's like... It just makes sense to me. And now I know what I real portion size looks like. It's like a whole new world has opened up. A light bulb has gone off. It's like, "DUH!" and "Ohhhhh.... so that's what that's supposed to look like." And I am actually enjoying myself. Granted, there are parts that are annoying... like having to take the time to pack my lunch for work every day and trying to eat at a restaurant (especially if that restaurant is not in my dining out book.) But the point is, I feel accountable when I have to keep track of everything that goes into my mouth. When I know what I ate and how much more I can eat.

It just makes sense.

So I am going to use this blog to post about my struggles and my triumphs... to write about how I feel about different aspects of the program, or how my days/weeks/months are going.

So I will finish off today's blog post with my first triumph. Tonight was our second meeting and our first weigh-in since we started the program. This first week I lost 4.6 pounds!!! And so did Mom. I find it really entertaining that we both lost the exact same amount of weight. And I find it awesome. I am so excited! I know that not every week will result in a loss like this, and that's okay. I will start figuring out new things to eat and to do. But right now, I am celebrating because I am a LOSER! :P (Get it... Because I lost weight... I'm a loser. Teehee. I can thank my AWESOME Weight Watchers leader for that one!)